Haircuts and Headaches
The above picture is my birthday haircut...a bit early but I really wanted it done. (I really like it, it's super cute and fun!) I had been wanting to go shorter again as I have these headaches that just won't go away. I pull my hair back all the time as it's just in the way for what I need to do every day here on the farm and being longer makes it quite uncomfortable. I had taken a lot off this time especially compared to last year's birthday cut in the pictures below.
But compared to my Covid hair this too was quite short. I'm 5'8" and after covid my hair was the entire length of my back and then some. It's super thick, and let me tell you, it is super heavy. The pull from it is like having a small animal hanging off the back of my head pulling me back...no wonder I was always in so much pain...even my back had to work that much harder. I don't know how much it helped with the headaches, but it has helped just with the pulling sensation and that has made a huge difference in my face pain anyway.
February 29, 2024
I have a headache every day! I wake up with them and just trudge through my day like this. Usually, I can ignore them thankfully, but sometimes they just get worse over the day. Not often, but I do take Naproxen for them and some of my other pain...sometimes it helps a bit but most often it doesn't, so I usually don't bother as it upsets my stomach more then it helps with pain. I've been given prescriptions for far stronger pain medication, but I do not dare even fill those prescriptions as most are habit forming and I won't do that to myself. I'd rather suffer in pain then become addicted to something that may not even make much of a difference in my pain level anyway, and instead make my life absolute hell...na, no thanks.
I was diagnosed with Cluster Headaches in high school, but these seem far worse than those. These headaches sometimes just sit behind my eyes and are just exhausting, other times they feel like the entire top of my skull is in a vice from my upper jaw to the top of my skull. Moving my eyes hurt. Thinking hurts. When I tell people I have a headache I say "But it only hurts from my teeth up" then painfully slightly giggle to make light of it, because laughing is one of my many coping mechanisms...either laugh or cry...I'd rather laugh, but the pain is so intense that tears run out anyway from all the pressure...but I still try to smile.
Having my hair pulled back with all that extra weight is a trigger for headaches as is wearing toques, headbands, even some hair clips touching my skin wrong, and the pain worsens. I also cannot wear glasses; the pain is unbearable from the moment they touch me. And although I do wear protective earmuffs as well as sometimes a helmet with full face and ear protective gear to work in, the pain, and just straight on discomfort it causes me, makes me not wear them very often unless it's completely necessary.
Even getting my hair cut is painful. All the touching and then the brushing. It's weird too because when I use to be a model I was picked and pawed at constantly yet now even the idea of someone trying to straighten my hair makes me almost freak out. The moment I see the hairbrush I tense up and hope it goes quickly. They ask me if I want to style my hair and I say no, to just let it naturally dry...yay for curly hair.
Asides from touch, I have many other triggers that cause headaches such as light, noise, sound, smells, stress, clenching, over exertion, heat, anxiety, allergies, weather...possibly other things. Again, I have a headache every day and no matter what I do to try and avoid having them, I wake up with one and it basically stays with me all day at different levels of pain. It is very difficult to avoid and quite tiresome, but I still try to push through my day and get done what I can when I can and look forward to maybe a better day tomorrow. I'm always happiest on sunny days with no humidity, whether it's warm or cold, if there's little breeze and I dress appropriately, it usually is a pretty great day!!!