Pictures of my pain yesterday (gosh, I'm pretty ;P ); 1. when I woke up, 2. as I was heading out to do chores, 3. after I came in from my stroll to the campsite. Being up at the campsite really does help with my healing, the fresh air, gentle walk, peacefulness...it's very calming!!! The cold breeze still played havoc though despite the headband and hood. My twin thought I had a stroke, so I sent her the last two pictures to let her know I was ok, hence the attempt of a little smile. I don't know about you, but chronic pain is exhausting!!!
April 24, 2024
I am so very tired. I had an extremely hard day yesterday with the Trigeminal Neuralgia! The pain was well above a nine at times and I couldn't even hold my left lid open. That eye kept dripping tears and my sight was blurrier than usual. I was thankful the sun ended up behind cloud cover, so it wasn't so bright out. I took some pictures of the pain at its worst plus another after I went for a 'stroll' up to the campsite. It was a slow walk up there and I didn't stay long as the wind was wild and was super cold on my sore ear even though I had on a winter headband and wore my hoodie up and tied. The pain was intense, and the periodic stabbing was right inside my left ear making me have to stop anything I was doing just to get through it.
Although I was in incredible pain and becoming increasingly exhausted, I still had to do my chores. I had to dump the cats' litters back at the manure pile, so I decided I'd go up to the campsite too, just to have a break, but it's all so terribly exhausting for me. I then picked some grass (what I call salad for the cats, they love it) and went to take care of them. It took me a lot longer than normal to take care of the cats as I had to sit often to ease the debilitating pain in my head. Because these guys are so close to the ground, most often I have to bend down to do anything, when I'd rise up again, the throbbing of the blood in my veins around the left side of my head would feel like they wanted to explode. I'd stop and just press on those veins trying to calm them down then I'd sit and wait it out. This was my entire day yesterday and it was most probably due to the fact that it rained last night. This morning when I finally woke up, I still had some pain but not like I did yesterday and today I am mostly just achy but still quite exhausted and the left side of my face, especially around my ear, feels full and swollen. And I say 'finally' woke up as I didn't get up until 1pm today...on the dot. I couldn't believe it when I looked at the clock, I was expecting it to be around 11am, what a shock that was. I did wake up a number of times throughout the night like I always do, I even did some somatic exercise in bed, but not at all did I think it was that late in the day. Gran always said I was "Sleeping my life away!" and she's right, but how can anyone function with this much horrific, debilitating pain and not be absolutely exhausted to the point that they do just keep on sleeping. I didn't even want to get up at 1 but I had chores to still do, and I knew I'd wake even more often tonight when I go back to bed so what's the point, then my sleep would be that much worse. It truly is a vicious cycle.
Back at the campsite!!! I love it back there! So peaceful and alone!
